I realize it was almost 3 months, not two since my last yoga lesson. I start things and quit things. Not really a “quitter” but I get diverted and attached to so many things that I just get tuckered out. I was so ready to dismiss yoga when my doctor advised me on it. I wasn’t thrilled about it. I figured I’d be the “fat lady”. But what I’ve learned in such a short time is that yoga is not really about my body but about my health and my mind. It’s about allowing myself a time to reflect and reach out. It’s not about what I look like but more about my need to heal, not just physically either. And I’m not about my body either. I’m overweight. For now. I’m not dieting, I’m healing. We’ve gone through so much these past few years. Death and illness and huge change. I stored my pain and stress. And now I’m taking care of my body, mind and spirit. I’m not the “fat lady”, I’m the “work in progress”.
I have never looked forward to anything or wanted anything that was related to exercise. I love rollerskating but it was always a bit of a chore.
But yoga… I miss it when I can’t attend. I looked at my mat and cried one night because I wanted to continue to feel good. Like all the strides I had made were just melting away.. I know they didn’t though. And now I’m more healthy and will get more benefit from it. I didn’t realize how sick I was.
I thought I had TFO Syndrome. Tired, Fat and Old. I tolerated pains that most wouldn’t. Maybe that’s a Mom affliction… But I needed to have my gallbladder removed and due to the arthritis medicines they had started me on just when I started yoga, it made me bleed horribly. Which put me in a weak state. Then stuff didn’t work otu well after surgery. Did the whole colonoscopy scare and tests, which last week came out find. I have a hernia from the surgery incision that is a bit of a bummer but I hope to have that taken care of.
It was a great return class to yoga. Bhakti was very giving and I like her. She says, “yummy spot” like you [Todd].